Coffee is my Motor.


My daily routine lately has been a pretty predictable one.  I get out of bed, shower and get dressed, then I make a pot of coffee.  The goal is to drink as much of it as I can before I leave so that when I arrive at work and have to fire all the thrusters, they work.

I blame the coffee addiction on my days as a coffee wench.  Free coffee?  Don’t mind if I do!  Next thing you know, you’re hooked and without it you’re a zombie, stumbling through the world, not even ambitious enough to want brains.

(Actual footage of me without my coffee.)

Seriously though, I think I’ve developed some major caffeine tolerance, because I drink lots before work and sometimes, that is my exact shuffle to the bus stop.  Just imagine him in a dress and denim jacket covered in patches.

I’m up to 11,500+ words now.  They say you need 55,000 approximately for a book – hopefully the ideas keep flowing, because my weird sense of humour finally seems to have a purpose!


Creation vs Depression

The last couple of years has been really tough.  It sort of created this black vortex, where everything I thought of creating just never got made.  Everything from music, to sculptures, to accessories.  Even my writing suffered in a huge way.

They say the best art comes from dark places, but what if it’s so dark you can’t find a small light to lead the way back out?

We lost two family members in 2016, and the tailspin it resulted in is only starting to correct itself the last little while.  Money problems compounded this, as did the fact we were both on evenings at work – and we both prefer days.  Recently, my boyfriend got day shift, and I am able to bid on a new schedule every three months, and my stats are looking good so that means I stand a chance of getting days as well.

For me, this means I will be able to work on art during the hours I am most mentally active.  It means when I come up with an idea I won’t be on break and need to go take calls in 15 minutes so I won’t just forgot to do it or be like “ah fuck it” when I do get home.

The writing has been the first step of getting back to creating again.  I am now driven to get our work space sorted out and all of my supplies organized so I can sit down and work in peace.  I have long put-off projects waiting to be made, and now I can actually imagine them coming to fruition.  I can finally start building up stock for my store as well, and get it online.

Anyway, back to writing!


By the Beard of Loki

It’s true that once your muse strikes, it’s hard to stop writing. Most people though, have to fit in their muse among their other duties. I fit in my writing before and after work, and how much time I get to write for depends on how much time I have to spare.

I’ve reached that point where the characters are now carrying the story and all I have to do is write down the narrative. It’s exciting, and I wish that I could spent all my waking time writing. Is this what it feels like to be a real boy?

Alas, it is off to work I go.


A Novel Idea.

After what has felt like a really long period of being unproductive due to being sick, being tired from work, and just life stuff in general, I’m finally doing it, I’m finally starting a novel again.  I did this back in 2003, but due to my own negligence to back it up by email or some other method besides the computer my ex decided to keep, I lost four chapters and a prologue.  I’ve written short stories and blogged since then but never actually finished getting my sh*t together and made a collective of them, or started a novel again.

I’m also working on a memoir – though, this one will be more for my own mental health than anything else and may never be published.  We shall see, I guess.  For now, getting out my ya-yas through the book and blogging and hoping for the best!

The hardest part about starting with a manuscript is trying to make it all correctly formatted because I’ve not written for so long.  I needed a refresher on random points, like formatting conversation properly, and the correct way to write footnotes (since my piece is fiction, and a lighthearted one at that, I don’t need too much formality in that department but wanted to know if I might get lambasted by those who read it).

Also, remembering to do double spaces after periods?  Ack.  Not something I think about doing usually, in every day writing like emails, etc.  Now I need to force myself to do it in everything so it becomes habit again.  Mostly, just enjoying lazy Sunday and not needing to go anywhere.


Sickly but Inspired

Feeling pretty miserable today, not much up to leaving the bed. However, I'm not a complete waste.

I've had a lot of ideas running around my head for a book in the past couple of years. Aside from wanting to write a memoir of sorts, I also want to get back to writing fiction. The problem was I had so many competing things in my brain, and none was taking shape. Well, it's finally happened. I have to figure out a few things still but it's begun!


Dude, Where’s My Book?

Many years ago, I started to write a book. 2003, to be exact. It started as a handwritten endeavor, simply because I didn’t own a computer at the time. That changed, I transcribed my work up until that point into text files, and continued to write. I managed to scrawl out about 4 chapters, plus a prologue – and then I split up with my ex-husband and he kept the computer (it was a gift to me from my mother, but he felt he should have it – like pretty much everything else in the split).

While I took a hiatus in England, my ex mostly used the computer for the Avenue Q description of its use, and I came back to requests for help to get it up and running properly again. A friend walked me through a system reinstall, and I lost everything I had written. My own fault, because I hadn’t learned to back up everything I write yet.

Now, of course I save things both on clouds and in my email.

Finally, over the last few years, I’ve come full circle and have desire to write again. This blog is one way of forcing myself to do it daily when I’m not working on my book – and honestly, I’m finding the process as addictive as I used to. Now I’m looking for decent writing apps for my phone so I don’t lose ideas while I’m not near my computer, and I’m coming up with random “what ifs”. The wheels are turning again and it’s important I keep it from stopping. I’m not sure why I even stopped now.